Feeling Taken for Granted? Here’s How to Restore Love and Connection

How to Stop Taking Your Partner for Granted and Rekindle Passion in Your Relationship

Have you ever felt taken for granted by your partner? Or noticed that, over time, the spark in your relationship has faded? You’re not alone. Many couples experience this shift—from excitement and passion to routine and even neglect. But the truth is, you can reignite that passion and create a relationship that’s extraordinary, not just ordinary.

Why Do We Take Our Partners for Granted?

In the beginning, everything is new. We go out of our way to make our partner feel special, and we see the best in them. But as time passes, familiarity sets in. We start to focus on what’s missing instead of what’s magical. The relationship becomes stagnant, and if left unchecked, it can wither. But here’s the good news: you have the power to change this pattern. You can learn how to make your partner feel valued again and bring back the excitement you once shared.

Let Go of Limiting Rules and Expectations

One of the biggest relationship killers is the silent set of rules we create for our partners. In the early days, we accept and even celebrate their differences. But over time, we start expecting them to act, think, and feel a certain way. When they don’t, we withhold love or become critical.

“Trade your expectations for appreciation and your whole relationship changes in an instant.” —Tony Robbins

I remember early in my marriage with Sage, there were moments when I caught myself expecting her to see things exactly as I did. I realized I was putting my own rules on her, and it was creating distance. The breakthrough came when I let go of those expectations and focused on loving her for who she truly is. That shift brought us closer and reignited the passion between us.

The Power of Polarity: The Secret to Lasting Passion

One of the most powerful forces in any intimate relationship is polarity—the dynamic interplay between masculine and feminine energy. It’s not about gender, but about the energy each partner brings. When there’s strong polarity, there’s natural attraction, excitement, and passion. Over time, many couples lose this spark by becoming too similar or by suppressing their true essence to avoid conflict. I’ve seen in my own marriage and in thousands of couples I’ve coached: when you honor and amplify your natural energies—whether that’s the drive and direction of the masculine or the flow and emotion of the feminine—you reignite the chemistry that brought you together. Polarity is the secret ingredient that keeps love alive and relationships extraordinary.

Appreciate the Power of Masculine and Feminine Energy

Another key to a passionate relationship is understanding and valuing the differences between masculine and feminine energy. Polarity creates passion. It’s not about gender—it’s about energy. The masculine is about direction and mission; the feminine is about emotion and connection.

There was a time when Sage and I were both under a lot of stress, and I found myself wanting her to be more logical, more like me. But when I stepped back and truly appreciated her emotional depth and intuition, it brought a new level of connection and excitement to our relationship. I learned to celebrate our differences, not try to erase them.

Manage Your Emotional State for Relationship Success

Your emotional state is the foundation of your relationship. When you’re in a beautiful state—energized, grateful, and loving—you bring out the best in your partner. But if you’re stressed, frustrated, or exhausted, it’s easy to take things out on the person you love most.

There have been days when I’ve come home drained from an event or a long day, and I could feel my energy affecting Sage. I made it a ritual to shift my state before I walked through the door—sometimes just by taking a few deep breaths, moving my body, or focusing on gratitude. That simple act changed the energy in our home and allowed us to connect on a deeper level.

Take Action: Love Is a Verb

Love isn’t just something you feel—it’s something you do. If you want to improve your relationship, take action. Show your partner the same devotion and excitement you did in the beginning. Small gestures of appreciation, kindness, and affection can heal old wounds and create new memories.

“Love is not a noun, it’s a verb. It’s action. It’s something you do every day.” —Tony Robbins

One of my favorite rituals with Sage is our “date with destiny” nights—no matter how busy life gets, we carve out time to be fully present with each other. Those moments keep our connection strong and remind us why we chose each other in the first place.

How to Make Your Relationship Last

Extraordinary relationships don’t happen by accident—they’re created by intention. If you want to stop taking your partner for granted and rekindle passion, start by appreciating them, celebrating your differences, and managing your own state. Treat your partner like the most important person in your life—because they are.Remember, “the quality of your life is the quality of your relationships.” Make the decision today to show up with love, passion, and gratitude, and watch your relationship transform.

“If you want your relationship to last, make your partner the most important person in your life—every single day.” —Tony Robbins