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Fear will destroy you or drive you

Tony, world-champion triathlete Siri Lindley, and Free Solo’s Sanni McCandless on how fear can fuel your fire

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We all experience fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear that we’re just not enough – fear is a common current that runs through all of our lives. You could be fearful of failing in business, or in a relationship. You could be fearful of death, or of not living life to its fullest. You could be fearful of asking your boss for a raise, or of your friends and family not accepting who you are. For so many people, fear rules their lives. And if we let it, fear can prevent us from reaching our true potential.

In this episode, we’re diving into fear – how it shows up, how we handle it in different ways, and how we can use it to serve a valuable purpose and achieve the lives we truly desire. You’ll first hear from Tony, as he shares his strategies on how he’s conditioned his OWN mind to overcome fear, in order to become a successful entrepreneur that impacts the lives of millions of people.

You’ll also hear from Siri Lindley, a world-champion triathlete and coach – who, at one point in her life, was so crippled by her own fears and OCD that she could barely leave her own house. Siri shares her story of how she turned her fears upside down – and gained the mental strength, courage, and toughness to become the best triathlete in the world, and find love and respect for herself along the way.

You may remember Sanni McCandless, from the Oscar-winning documentary, ‘Free Solo,’ that follows her boyfriend, Alex Honnold, as he attempts to climb El Capitan – the 3,000 foot granite face looming over Yosemite Valley, without any ropes or safety harnesses. But not all fears are about life and death. You’ll hear how Sanni, a life coach, helps her clients work through everyday fears, and get a glimpse into how she overcame her own fear the day that Alex free soloed the El Capitan climb.

About Siri Lindley

Siri Lindley is a life coach, triathlon coach and former professional triathlete. She is the 2001 ITU Triathalon World Champion as well as the winner of the 2001 and 2002 ITU Triathalon World Cup series and the 2001 ITU Aquathlon World Championships. Today, she uses her experiences, knowledge and insight to train other athletes to become not only world champion athletes, but also world champion people. She is the Co-President of Believe Ranch and Rescue in Boulder, Co., an organization that rescues dogs and horses from abuse and neglect.

About Sanni McCandless

Sanni McCandless, CPC, ELI-MP, is a transition coach for outdoor-focused individuals who want to create more tailored, intentional lifestyles and find agency in their own lives. In her work, she helps people overcome the doubts and concerns that constantly get in the way of living fearlessly and feeling fulfilled. Sanni challenges clients to communicate more honestly with those around them, stop making fear-based decisions, and achieve goals that have been on the back burner for too long. Sanni is also a cofounder of the event series and resource hub, Outwild.

EPISODE NOTES

[00:54] Episode introduction
[01:38] Sanni on how she felt the day of Alex’s climb
[02:23] Sanni’s desire to give Alex every advantage
[03:14] Not all fears are about life and death
[04:04] Segment 1: How Tony has used his fear
[04:28] What will get you out of a fearful place
[05:01] Tony’s fear of not living life to its fullest
[05:24] How Tony conditions his mind to get past fear
[06:00] Why Tony does a cold plunge every day
[06:29] The discipline of not negotiating with fear
[06:58] If you feed your fear, it’ll grow
[07:42] The mind is more powerful if you learn to direct it
[08:42] The only way through fear is massive action
[09:12] Discipline destroys you or drives you
[09:35] Fear comes from focus
[10:03] How your patterns of focus control your life
[10:55] Pattern 1: When you focus on what’s missing
[11:30] Focus exercise: Find everything around you that’s brown
[12:16] If you only look for what’s missing you’ll never feel whole
[12:38] Pattern 2: When you focus on what you can’t control
[13:12] Do you focus on the past, present or future?
[13:53] Why Tony uses priming meditation to change his focus
[15:18] Focus on the excitement, not the fear
[15:45] The power of disciplining your mind
[16:26] To learn more about priming go to www.tonyrobbins.com/priming
[16:40] Segment 2: How Siri Lindley became the best triathlete in the world
[17:45] Siri’s experience at Brown University
[18:48] Siri’s struggle with OCD
[19:40] Siri contemplates taking her own life
[20:14] The one night that changed Siri’s entire life
[20:53] Siri’s negative patterns of focus
[21:45] Siri decides to let go over her fears
[22:10] Siri decides to become the best triathlete in the world
[22:43] The problem with Siri’s plan to be a triathlete
[23:25] Siri models the best triathletes in the world
[23:55] Siri’s first day training with legendary coach Brett Sutton
[25:01] The most difficult bike ride of Siri’s life
[25:53] The brilliant part of pushing yourself
[26:19] You can either leave, or find a way
[27:14] The “why” that kept Siri going
[27:49] Siri’s biggest fear all along
[28:21] Segment 3: Sanni McCandless’ approach to fear
[28:52] How Sanni helps her clients navigate fear
[29:18] What happens when you don’t create boundaries at work
[29:48] The fear of being seen as difficult to work with
[30:34] The process of questioning internal doubt
[31:16] The steps you need to take after a breakthrough
[32:08] Identifying a new mantra to believe
[32:58] The power of creating a new identity
[33:21] When the fear of failure becomes crippling
[34:18] Every failure leads you to where you’re going next
[34:50] How every fall in climbing leads to an ultimate success
[35:59] Mistakes vs. learning opportunities
[36:25] Adults are terrified of trial and error
[36:55] Sanni decides to support Alex’s dream despite her fears
[37:18] Sanni’s experience the day of Alex’s El Capitan climb
[37:47] The sense of calm brought on by relinquishing control
[38:20] Sanni cleans as Alex climbs El Capitan

Team Tony

Team Tony cultivates, curates and shares Tony Robbins’ stories and core principles, to help others achieve an extraordinary life.

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