Don’t like your body? Your relationship? Your job?
So often we sit around, thinking about how unhappy we are about one thing or another. We wonder, “How do I change?” without putting effort into it. We blame our circumstances or make excuses for why we can’t change – at least not right now. Here’s a secret: The only person capable of changing your life for the better is you.
Fear comes in many forms – but all of them are limiting beliefs. These are the beliefs you hold about who you are and what you’re capable of. And they’re the only thing that holds you back from embracing how to change yourself. Here’s how to overcome your fears, make a decision and fully commit to it – no matter what.
Self-doubt is often a part of our negative internal monologue. “Maybe I shouldn’t really do this,” we think. “Maybe it’s not a good idea.” We ask ourselves over and over again if we should bother lifting weights or eating better. It’s not going to work anyway, is it? You’ve done it before and it didn’t work then. And everyone has a job they don’t like. Failing would be terrible, so you don’t even make an effort. Eliminating these negative beliefs and replacing them with empowering ones is the first step toward how to change your life.
Fear of failure is another common limiting belief that prevents us from fully committing to our goals. The key to following through when you’re committed to change is to fight off your fear of failure. Of course you’re afraid; any sort of change can be frightening. But if you fail to even make an attempt, then you’ll be exactly where you’ve always been. You might not fail, but you also won’t grow. You won’t learn. Shift your mindset to think of failures as learning opportunities and your whole world will change.
Committing to change is easier when you face it with someone who’s been there. Find someone who has achieved the results that you want – they lost 30 pounds, have their dream career or are truly happy with their life. Find out what steps this person took to get where they are today. What decision did they commit to that made them take that first step into the future they wanted? Finding someone who inspires you in this way is called modeling, and it’s a great way to determine the steps you need to take to reach your goal.
The answer to “How do I change?” is always to look within yourself. Every human being follows patterns in their thoughts and actions. People don’t achieve repeated success because they’re lucky. They achieve repeated success because they’ve found something that works – a formula, strategy or tactic – and they’ve adjusted these patterns to work for them instead of against them. When you find someone to model, look at their patterns and habits and apply them to your own life. You’ll likely find they have a strong morning ritual, leverage the power of proximity and feed their minds with the right fuel.
What’s one small decision you could make right now that would take you in the direction you need to go? What’s a big decision that might be really tough, but if you made it, it would take you in a new direction in your life? Write these things down, and start making plans to see them through. They may not happen instantly – they will probably take time and effort – but writing something down is a powerful way to tell yourself you’re going to make something happen. They aren’t just words in your mind anymore. They’re words on paper, a list you can look at again and again.
A lot of people tend to make “sorta kinda” decisions: “I’ll do this. . . someday.” Here’s the secret behind why people don’t follow through: The reason people don’t commit to a decision is that they don’t act on it. You may have thought that it’s the other way around – that you have to commit to a decision before you act on it. But the only way to prove to yourself that you’re completely committed to change and are going to follow through is if you push yourself to take the first step, which is the hardest step to take.
We’ve established that if you get in your head, you’re dead. The brain is a great tool to strategize with, but there’s a point where you have to commit to a decision, act on it and move yourself forward. When you make a decision, also take some form of action that will move you in the direction you want to go. Sign up for the membership at the gym. Start thinking about what you want your career to look like. Maybe you need to take a class or read a book to start learning new tactics to improve at your job. The smallest of changes can lead to big results if you follow through with them.
Small changes are the foundation of how to change your life, but true fulfillment comes from continuous personal growth. If you’re not growing, you’re dying – so instead of achieving just one goal, commit to constant and never-ending improvement, or CANI. Commit to being the best you can be in every area of your life: relationships, family, career and more. Growth is a journey, and once you begin that journey, you’ll never want to stop.
When you’re committed to change, life starts to look different. You stop fearing what might happen and instead embrace it. You stop wondering, “How can I change?” and instead take massive action. So what if you fail? At least you learned something – that means you’ve grown. By shifting the way you approach things and realizing that only you can make a difference in your own life, you’ll change the way you think about yourself and the story you’re living.
Ready to make the change you need? Unleash the Power Within is a 4-day immersive experience designed to help you break through your personal barriers and live the life you deserve.