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From the Vault: Jampolsky and Cirincione part 2
How to give to others and find peace of mind
Letting go of the past and forgiving are difficult for many of us, especially when our trust has been betrayed. In the two-part podcast featuring award-winning psychologists and authors Dr. Gerald Jampolsky and his partner, Dr. Diane Cirincione, Tony and his guests talk about being the master of your own emotions, understanding that all responses are based on love or fear and how forgiveness is the biggest gift we can give another person.
Missed part one of this podcast? Listen to it here, then dive into part two, where Gerald and Diane delve deeper into finding peace of mind, acting out of intention and having the courage to experience true harmony in your life.
From the Vault: Tony Robbins & Dr. Gerald Jampolsky & Diane Cirincione (Part 2)
Dr. Gerald Jampolsky & Dr. Diane Cirincione Show Notes
[1:58] Strategies to enhance what is valuable in your life
[4:50] When goals become intentions
[6:00] Negative experiences create negative filters
[8:00] Living within your ideal values
[11:30] Finding peace of mind
[13:00] Physical healing
[15:45] The biggest gift we can give a person
[17:00] Letting go of fear by helping another
[19:20] Beliefs or actions you can take starting now
[24:00] The intention of not judging other people
[25:00] Asking yourself how you can be helpful to another person
[25:40] The courage to have true harmony in your life
[26:20] The most important lesson they have learned
[28:50] How they would like to be remembered
Forgiveness and guilt go hand in hand, and Dr. Diane Cirincione discusses how guilt is the result of clinging to an old belief system. These belief systems served us at one point in our lives, but if we continue to hold onto them, they lead to limiting beliefs that prevent us from letting go and moving on. When we see that our old systems no longer have value, it’s easier to change them and develop healthier beliefs that empower us.
Goals vs. intentions
In this podcast episode, Diane shares an impactful realization that changed how she thought and behaved. Instead of having multiple goals, she focused on one goal: to have peace of mind. Every other goal turned into an intention. This allowed her to avoid dangerous expectations and no longer get attached to the outcomes of situations. When you learn to embrace the moment with the sole purpose of being at peace with it, it transforms your life.
The greatest gift we can give others
Forgiveness is about releasing the past. The greatest gift we can give others, according to Diane, is to not see the shadow of the past in them. When we see them for who they are at the present moment, we can offer them unconditional love and stay connected to them as we go through life changes and transformations. It’s impossible to forgive when we still see our loved one’s past mistakes and betrayals every time we look at them. When we release that shadow, we can embrace a new beginning.
Seeing yourself as a mirror
The secret to living is giving, and when you love yourself, it makes it possible to love and give to others. Gerald suggests that we see ourselves as a mirror. What we think of ourselves is reflected in others and if you become angry or upset with someone, it’s likely due to an aspect of our own selves we struggle with. Constantly ask yourself how you can be helpful to others and, when you’re triggered by someone else’s actions, turn the light back on yourself to see what you need to work on.
Words matter: “You” vs. “I” – Even when you have the best of intentions, what you say can escalate an argument into a full-blown fight and really hurt the one you love.
Why we all need pain – Pain is part of life, and while it is seen by most as something to be avoided, pain can actually open a well and present you with a valuable opportunity to grow.
The beauty of uncertainty – We cannot control someone else’s heart, but the beauty of this uncertainty is that it create a space for our ultimate spiritual growth, so we can find more joy and more happiness than anywhere else.